In this second Couple and Baby lesson, we will be exploring the health and happiness of your marriage. You will see the importance of friendship as the core of a good marriage. You will get some exercise in simple ways to build the friendship in your marriage.
At one time my husband, Mike, was having some back pain. His therapist said his back was strong, but it was not flexible. Marriage is like our backs. Without the flexibility that friendship imparts to your marriage, the strains of bringing a baby into your relationship can cause real pain. When we sincerely enjoy our spouse, we are more willing to make the necessary sacrifices and find ways to please each other.
This Couple and Baby Class is an opportunity to prepare for this next step in your relationship, parenting. Growing your friendship is good at every stage of your relationship. Every marriage will benefit from affirming and appreciating your spouse. It is the flexible backbone of marriage and parenting.
Begin this lesson by using, “How Healthy is Your Marriage?” to evaluate your starting point. You may each want to do this exercise alone and then compare your results. This is not for a grade, but rather to help you see where you agree or disagree on areas of strength or weakness in your marriage. No couple gets a perfect score. All couples can see areas they want to improve.
In this lesson we concentrate on affirmation and appreciation. Begin by reading, “Affirm and Appreciate.” Then “Affirm Your Spouse” looks at the problem of hyper-criticism and some of the reasons we don’t affirm. Finally read, “The Thankful Lover.”
Now for some fun exercises
Just as you build your friendship with your spouse, you also build your relationship with your child. You begin by observing your baby in infancy and continue through early childhood. Begin by clicking the link to “Baby Expressions” and follow the link to Baby Emotions and States of Consciousness.
Read and do, “Affirmation Exercise.”
Finish by using The Gottman Card Deck, Give Appreciation.”
If you already have a child, you may like to click the link and read, “Affirm Your Child.”